2010-01-28 / Sam Bari

Full disclosure could have prevented this ‘war’ between the sexes

You can’t beat a system you can’t understand
By Sam Bari

On Feb. 7, 2010, for many football fans around the globe, the year will come to a screeching halt. Until the season starts again in the fall, the months will drag by slowly enough to make a congressional filibuster feel speedy.

Superbowl 44 will mark the fi- nal battle of the season, followed by a celebration for the victorious team. However, the biggest fight will take place off the field.

In living rooms, recreation rooms and media rooms across the country, the war between “football fans” and Superbowl “party fans” will be in full swing throughout the game.

Let’s not mince words here. It’s about time this subject was brought out in the open and put to rest.

There are those who assume the position by parking their butts in front of a television or at a stadium throughout football season to watch 16 weeks of football and four weeks of play-offs.

They want to celebrate the end of the season with the game of games, the legendary Superbowl. You know who you are.

Then there are those who hate football and want to celebrate the end of the season with a gala party. And you know who you are.

Those who hate football want to ruin the Superbowl for those who love football by celebrating the end of the season with such fervor during the final game that the football lovers cannot hear or see the contest.

They accomplish their goal in several ways.

They talk and screech in unison so the game announcer cannot be heard. While they are doing

that, they parade back and forth in front of the screen, and sometimes stop to hold conversations there so the football fans cannot watch the action.

However, the football haters do watch the screen at half-time so they can see the commercials and the half-time extravaganza. Nonetheless, as soon as the game continues, they announce that dinner is served so the play by play is interrupted by a parade of bodies holding plates stacked with goodies. Again, the screen is blocked as if it were a minor annoyance interrupting their revelry.

Those who love football think a Superbowl party is a fantastic way to honor the game that is as American as apple pie. Those people believe that the celebration is a great way to enjoy the tradition with their friends who are of like mind.

Now comes the rub. The football fans invite their buddies, who are also football fans, who bring guests who are not football fans to said party.

Then, the battle begins.

Are you with me? Have I drawn the proverbial line in the sand? Is this what has happened every year for 43 insufferable, annoying Superbowls?

Let’s identify this seeming deadlock for the demon that it is. Some see it as the ultimate battle between the sexes.

He is going to say that he works hard all week and deserves to enjoy a little time doing what he wants for only 16 weeks out of the year.

She is going to say that the 16 weeks are followed by a month of play-offs and the Sunday afternoon game time is then filled by 39 weeks of NASCAR as seasons cross, punctuated by baseball, hockey, basketball and golf.

He will counter with, “That is when she goes shopping and spends my hard-earned money.” She will say that she also works all week and spends their hardearned money on really stupid stuff like food, clothes for the children and household necessities.

She will also say that it would be nice to have a little help once in a while, because that kind of shopping is not a pleasurable task.

The football fan does not appear to be winning this game. It looks as if we might be dealing with a sports addict.

She will say, “He wasn’t like this when he courted me.” He will say, “She never said she didn’t like sports.”

She will say, “I thought that getting married meant sharing a life together.” He will say, “So why doesn’t she share my love for sports?”

I think we can see that compromises could be made on both sides of the ball. The fault lies in bad contract negotiations before joining the team. Both sides are guilty of not making full, truthful disclosure, creating a war that can’t be won.

I choose to treat it as part of a system we can’t understand.

Return to top